Day 14 - Arran (Glen Rosa)

It's already been two nights here and I don't want to leave. Today I feel dehydrated and my legs hurt, so maybe one more night. It's very peaceful here on this flood plain. Hudson seems content surveying the landscape and guarding the toilet block whilst I'm in there. The birds here whistle like people trying to get your attention. I still always turn around in the hope a familiar silhouette has tracked me down and come to ease my withered ghost. I can feel the day to turn back getting closer. As I wrote that last sentence my pen ran out.
I have seen some amazing places and taken some healing time. Still, there is a hole in my heart that will never quite heal, I really need to let her know. Having a life without her in it somehow seems a waste at this point.
The reality of no showers and no bed is starting to grate. My back aches and I feel covered in a layer of grease. Plus, my cash is running out and I'll need what's left to cover my journey into my new life, whatever that may be. I plan to travel to London, perhaps start heading south after I get to Oban. I may eventually fold if I think I can get a cheap enough train ticket. Once in London I'll call in a few offers for a place to stay and try eek out a couple of weeks survival before deciding what to do. Hopefully it all sticks. I'm not sure what I'll do if I find I don't want to stay, I'm left bereft of motivation or ambition in this old country. To leave might not be the answer, but I need to find a comfortable corner somewhere and at least I have a few people in London who've got my back.
The burden of the trailer is a real pig and so are the panniers. I feel like I could fly around this country now otherwise. Hudson is tired of the trailer and I'm fed up of him in it. He's developed a fantastic skill of unwrapping every single separate item of food and stamping it to dust or slowly tipping important bits of gear over the sides somehow. Another fatal flaw of the bike is that I never got a kickstand for it. Trying to coax Hudson back into the trailer while holding up the heavy back end of the bike as the front wheel turns to roll the whole thing on it's side is a farce I no longer wish to be a part of. These last couple of days walking have been a real pleasure and I've had time to reflect on all these things. I would do it better next time, but in the meantime, this has been the most rewarding thing I have ever done alone. It may be one of the most fun times I've ever been a part of, so I'm proud of myself for that.
I can't even stand on my tiptoes today without collapsing in pain so one more day here then an easy 14 miles up to Lochranza for the ferry across to Kintyre.